Sunday, December 30, 2007

Awards, memes and spanking oh my!

Okay, there's no question that my new Christmas shoes are great.

But look what else I got last week!


It's The Royal Banana, awarded for general blog yumminess and bestowed by Rachel over at one of the yummiest blogs I know - A Southern Fairytale. If you are familiar with her site you know that this girl knows good blog. This is the second year she has scoured the internets for her favorites and I am beyond honoured that Don Mills Diva is one of two Canadians that made her short list. Thanks Rachel - you rock!

And in one of those coincidences that proves the internets is really just a happy little coffee clatch, another one of Rachel's favorites (and mine too) is the witty and raw Lotus over at Sarcastic Mom and last week she tagged me for this Questions About Your Week meme.

Here goes:

What did you accomplish?
I actually made it onto my stairmaster for 30 minutes the last three days in a row!

Did anything not go as expected?
Actually no - things went pretty much as I anticipated. Christmas week was really busy - a little stressful - but as always a time to really enjoy my family and reflect on how lucky I am that they are all remarkably loving and sane.

What was the highlight?
I wish I could say that it was Graham opening his presents, but at barely two he just wasn't all that excited about the whole concept. Am I allowed to say it was when I left Graham with Grandma for a few hours and daddy and I snuck off and hit the ski slopes on Boxing Day and the sun was out and we drank wine on the patio between runs? Am I a bad mom if I say that?

Did anything exciting happen you did not expect?
Uh - did you not see my Royal Banana Award?

I'm hereby tagging:

Metromama
Random Acts of Momness
Mighty Morphin' Mama

So anyway, on a more serious note I was also tagged by Buttermom - she of the Classy Chaos to reveal my approach to discipline when it comes to my child. Her own post on her brief flirtation with spanking is so touching and thought-provoking I'm sure it got a lot of people thinking. Here's what I think:

When it comes to spanking I think people think about it too much. I think if you take the time to consider whether spanking is a good or bad method of punishment for a child you're probably a good parent. Most parents I know debate spanking endlessly and the fact we are engaging in debate means we are striving to do best by our children. That striving, that care and consideration, is generally proof of loving and thoughtful parenting, whether or not spanking is used as a method of discipline.

I hit Graham a few months ago and the feelings I struggled with afterwards produced a post that some people described as my most poignant ever. I felt guilty. I felt angry. I turned myself inside and out in the aftermath before finally reaching the following conclusions:

1. I am a loving and conscientious mother
2. I don't think spanking is a good way to discipline children and it should be avoided
3. Being human, I will probably lose my temper periodically throughout Graham's childhood
4. That may sometimes result in a swat/ smack/ spanking
5. If it does I will try and use it as a teaching moment and move on

So there you have it - I'm sure this will not be the last time I revisit my feelings about spanking and discipline because, like you, I'm constantly striving to be the best parent I can be.

I would love to hear thoughts on spanking and discipline from:

Heidi at Viking Conquest / Family Adventure
Laura over at Walking Lunatic Fringe
My expectant mother friend over at A New Duck (I'm wondering if she's already articulated a philosophy before baby has even arrived)

Cheers!

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19 comments:

Dayna said...

Congrats on the award and I loved seeing your discipline philosophy spelled out like that.

:) Have a wonderful New Year.

GoMommy said...

Congratulations on your Royal Banana! It's so nice to be recognized for your awesome writing! It's not easy to make mommyhood sound so HIP and exciting, but you do it effortlessly!
Thank you for the tag! I almost cried and felt I should make some sort of speech, but that's the kind of nut I am! So, thanks!

Kellan said...

Again - off to the ski slopes and again ... I am sooooooooo jealous and yet I think you are very lucky!! I enjoyed all of your answers. Have a good Sunday. Kellan

Jen said...

I remember my son's first Christmas-he fell asleep through the whole thing. #2 was only slightly better.

Re: spanking...I think you've got the right idea. As long as we can learn from our mistakes, we can move forward.

Nap Warden said...

Hey, congrats on the banana! I do alot of timeouting in my house...not sure it works, but so far it's my best option...

suchsimplepleasures said...

hey...we have matching awards!!!

Laural Dawn said...

Great award! Congrats.
I think I have a similar philosophy on spanking. I don't agree with it, and I won't do it, but I think when you're considering the debate you are on the right track.

Dawn said...

I love, love, love your new Christmas shoes. Also, thanks for sharing all the great blogs to go and look at.

Tot's Mom said...

Congrats on the award! Regarding spanking, I don't do it but at the same time, it's hard to control our temper sometimes when it comes to a young kid. So, I yell and even that makes me feel incredibly guilty afterwards!!

Badness Jones said...

Congrats on your award!

Family Adventure said...

Hey DMD! Congrats on your award, which I totally support :)

Thanks for that tag. I will definitely write a post on it once we are back from the UK. It's an interesting topic, and I concur with lots of your thoughts, which is probably no surprise...

Hope you have a fab New Year's Eve with your family! Happy 2008!!

Heidi :)

Beck said...

Congratulations!
Happy new year!

Barrie said...

Huge congratulations on your blogging award! And...Happy New Year!

OHmommy said...

Cheers! And congrats on your award. Well deserved. I love your blog.

Kristen said...

Congrats! Too fun!
thanks for the tag, I will have to get on that post:)

Rachel said...

Hi there :-)
So glad you are excited about your award! I hope it brings you new readers, because more people should know about you!
I enjoyed reading this!!!

I hope you have a brilliant 2008, full of slutty shoes, happy kids and great memories.

Amanda said...

Wonderful post. Thank you so much for a holiday tradition I can embrace!

Happy new year!

newduck said...

Hey! I've been off-line for over a week and just saw that you tagged me. I hate to admit I'm so technologically backwards I have no idea how to tag someone in my blog, or even how one is supposed to respond to a tag. So, here's my philosophy on spanking children. It's generally something I'd like to avoid, but I feel like I'll probably resort to it from time to time. Mothering is hard! I think if you try your best NEVER to spank your children, when you finally do spank them, it's probably for a really serious transgression. I also think that people pass too-harsh judgement on parents who spank their children. Every parent has a different approach to raising their children, and I hate seeing people try to impose their child-rearing values on other people. It's obvious that you're an AMAZING mother, and I think you have a great approach to the spanking issue.

OHmommy said...

Congrats on your award. Well deserved. I heart your blog.

You are an amazing woman and mother! Happy New Year!!!